How many times have you had this thought:
“I’ll be A when I get B.”
Yeah… I know that one well. Here are some personal examples from my own brain:
“I’ll be a great artist when I have my own studio space.”
“I’ll be successful at making jewelry when I’ve made over a 1,000 sales.”
“I’ll be a real teacher when I have just one more certification.”
Do you see why this thought pattern blows?
I’m basically denying everything in my present, and letting myself have nothing now. When I look at those statements above I feel empty, and unfulfilled… Basically, I feel like a failure.
You’ve heard us say before that failure is a stepping stone to success, and that is incredibly true – BUT,
There are different types of failure – some that will move you forward, and some that will hold you back.
Let’s dig into these types of failure, starting with positive failures:
– Having an idea, bringing it to life and watching it crash and burn
– Putting content out that is not the best you’ve ever made
– Creating something that is weak, or breaks or falls apart (I can’t tell you how many pieces of jewelry I’ve made that as soon as I tried it on fell apart)
– Putting yourself out there and getting rejected
Those are only a few examples of POSITIVE FAILURE. What do they all have in common? In each example effort was exerted. The mental idea was made manifest.
The beauty of positive failure is in making the effort which, even if it ends up being a total turd, moves you forward to the next step because you have new knowledge. This failure has give you insight – now you know what works and what doesn’t. You’ll never go back to square one because at square one you knew nothing. You are now at square 2 or 3, with newer ideas and you will try new approaches. Each approach will teach you something new that will continue to move you forward to success.
Now, let’s look at negative failures:
– Having an idea, and shooting down before you’ve even tested it
– Waiting to put content out because it’s not good enough. Then deciding it will never, ever be good enough so why bother putting it out there.
– Creating something that breaks, then deciding you suck at making things so you will never try again.
– Being so afraid of rejection that you never put yourself out there, and so no one benefits from your knowledge, gifts, or kindness.
Negative Failures keep you in the dark – spiritually, emotionally, mentally and in terms of what you are creating – physically. Your creations never see the light of day.
We tend to think our failures only effect us, but as you can see in my examples above of negative failures, they can have quite an effect on other people too.
When we engage in negative failure we don’t expand our energies, denying the natural ripple effect the Universe so longs to create.
In fact, take a moment and think of someone you truly admire, someone who’s work has changed your life. Now ask yourself, “did they fail?” Your first thought may be “no,” but in truth they failed many times before they created something or became someone you find truly inspirational.
So, let’s go back to that first statement:
“I will be A when I have B.”
This statement is a negative failure statement because it denies anything that is happening now, including: inspiration, attempts, actions taken, and even small successes that may already be occurring.
If you and don’t stay consciously aware of these self-defeating thoughts it will take you down the road of true failure – a failure to even try.
I want to help you stay out of that negative failure zone so, I’ve made a quick assessment tool you can use to see if you are hanging out in Negative Failure or Positive Failure.
- Start by thinking of something you are trying to accomplish. Have it in your head? Good!
- Identify your current belief around this situation. Do you feel you are succeeding or failing at it?
- Ask yourself “Why?” Why are you succeeding? Why are you failing?
- If you feel your succeeding *high five,* carry on my friend! If you feel like you are failing, then what will make you a success?
- Once you’ve identified what you believe will make you a success, check in to see how that personal belief makes you feel. If it lifts you up, makes you want to jump out of bed and get to work then it is a positive belief serving your Highest good. On the other hand, if the belief deflates you, makes you feel small, empty, hollow, and ready to walk away for good then you are engaging in beliefs that will generate negative failure.
- If you’ve identified Negative Failure beliefs you can easily start turning them around by doing the Quick Life Review. (See link on how to do a Life Review.)
Finally, I want you to remember something you probably know by heart:
“Life is a journey… And so is success.”
You might always feel like there will be more to accomplish in order to be a success. That is OK. Make peace with this idea. It is the nature of the Universe to expand, and as a part of the Universe you will always be expanding. Let this be part of your joy in life as well as a part of your success. If you want more support in creating
a success mindset and manifesting a life you love check out our Success Circle Membership.